False Teachers, Damnable Heresies, and Doctrines of Devils

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false teachersWhat is your response when you hear false teaching? Should a Christian expose lies taught by others? Is it our duty to call out men who preach heresies? When a false gospel is proclaimed should we overlook it?

There seems to be two schools of thought on this. The first is that as Christians we are not to judge someone’s ministry. We should never call out a false teacher. If they claim to be a Christian who teaches the truth, we should take their word for it. After all, as children of God we are to unite under the love of Jesus and purposely steer clear of divisive doctrines that destroy fellowship. Didn’t Jesus want us all united?

The second thought is found in 1 John 4:1, “Beloved, believe not every spirit, but try the spirits whether they are of God: because many false prophets are gone out into the world.”

The first thought sounds noble, even Christ-like. After all, unity of believers is important. But unity should never come at the expense of truth! When faced with the same thought, Charles Spurgeon replied,

“To remain divided is sinful! Did not our Lord pray, that they may be one, even as we are one?” A chorus of ecumenical voices keep harping the unity tune. What they are saying is, “Christians of all doctrinal shades and beliefs must come together in one visible organization, regardless… Unite, unite!” Such teaching is false, reckless and dangerous. Truth alone must determine our alignments. Truth comes before unity.

Do you enjoy watching TBN, listening to sermons, reading Christian books, doing Bible studies, or following after preachers and teachers? Let me offer a word of caution. Beware! False teachers, damnable heresies, and doctrines of devils abound. Truth is not guaranteed just because someone claims to be a Christian preacher, a book is sold in a Christian book store, or a church is in your same denomination.

False teaching is slowly creeping into local churches all around us. It is subtle. It is hard to spot. Yet, it spreads in a deadly fashion. But, again this is really nothing new. Did you know that throughout the New Testament this is constantly dealt with? Jesus deals with false teachers and how to judge them. Paul addresses it, tells us to mark certain men, and calls those out by name who are in error. In Galatians he says, “If any man preach any other gospel unto you than that ye have received, let him be accursed.” James warns those who would be teachers of the greater condemnation. Peter deals with it, as does every epistles of John. In fact, John warns us to not let false teachers into our home (false teaches can come in via the TV, books, or computer as well), or even wish them “God speed” because in doing so we become a “partaker of his evil deeds,” 2 John 1:11.

In fact, every New Testament book (with the exception of one) deals with recognizing false teachers, guarding against false doctrine, correcting false doctrine that was taught, or warning those who would be teachers. The only exception is the small personal letter Paul wrote to Philemon. Twenty-six out of twenty-seven books of the New Testament address this (listed below). Therefore, it must be important.

Not only should we call out false teachers and their lies, but we are responsible to. The church is the pillar and ground of the truth (1 Timothy 3:15). We cannot even worship God without the truth (John4:24). And Jesus prayed that we would be sanctified through the truth (John 17:17). Christians need to be bold and never back down from all the truth in God’s Word. But, we also need to speak the truth in love and as much as possible,“of some have compassion, making a difference: And others save with fear, pulling them out of the fire; hating even the garment spotted by the flesh,” Jude 1:22-23.

  • Matthew – Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep’s clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves. (Mat 7:15)
  • Mark – For false Christs and false prophets shall rise, and shall shew signs and wonders, to seduce, if it were possible, even the elect. (Mar 13:22)
  • Luke – And he said, Take heed that ye be not deceived: for many shall come in my name, saying, I am Christ; and the time draweth near: go ye not therefore after them. (Luk 21:8)
  • John – But he that is an hireling, and not the shepherd, whose own the sheep are not, seeth the wolf coming, and leaveth the sheep, and fleeth: and the wolf catcheth them, and scattereth the sheep. The hireling fleeth, because he is an hireling, and careth not for the sheep. (Joh 10:12-13)
  • Acts – For I know this, that after my departing shall grievous wolves enter in among you, not sparing the flock. Also of your own selves shall men arise, speaking perverse things, to draw away disciples after them. (Act 20:29-30)
  • Romans – Now I beseech you, brethren, mark them which cause divisions and offences contrary to the doctrine which ye have learned; and avoid them. For they that are such serve not our Lord Jesus Christ, but their own belly; and by good words and fair speeches deceive the hearts of the simple. (Rom 16:17-18)
  • 1 Corinthians – I write not these things to shame you, but as my beloved sons I warn you. For though ye have ten thousand instructors in Christ, yet have ye not many fathers: for in Christ Jesus I have begotten you through the gospel. (1Co 4:14-15)
  • 2 Corinthians – For such are false apostles, deceitful workers, transforming themselves into the apostles of Christ. And no marvel; for Satan himself is transformed into an angel of light. Therefore it is no great thing if his ministers also be transformed as the ministers of righteousness; whose end shall be according to their works. (2Co 11:13-15)
  • Galatians – I marvel that ye are so soon removed from him that called you into the grace of Christ unto another gospel: Which is not another; but there be some that trouble you, and would pervert the gospel of Christ. But though we, or an angel from heaven, preach any other gospel unto you than that which we have preached unto you, let him be accursed. As we said before, so say I now again, If any man preach any other gospel unto you than that ye have received, let him be accursed. (Gal 1:6-9)
  • Ephesians – That we henceforth be no more children, tossed to and fro, and carried about with every wind of doctrine, by the sleight of men, and cunning craftiness, whereby they lie in wait to deceive; (Eph 4:14)
  • Philippians – (For many walk, of whom I have told you often, and now tell you even weeping, that they are the enemies of the cross of Christ: Whose end is destruction, whose God is their belly, and whose glory is in their shame, who mind earthly things.) (Php 3:18-19)
  • Colossians – And this I say, lest any man should beguile you with enticing words. (Col 2:4) Beware lest any man spoil you through philosophy and vain deceit, after the tradition of men, after the rudiments of the world, and not after Christ. (Col 2:8)
  • 1 Thessalonians – Chapter 4, whole chapter is written to correct false teaching that they received.
  • 2 Thessalonians – Now we beseech you, brethren, by the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ, and by our gathering together unto him, That ye be not soon shaken in mind, or be troubled, neither by spirit, nor by word, nor by letter as from us, as that the day of Christ is at hand. Let no man deceive you by any means: for that day shall not come, except there come a falling away first, and that man of sin be revealed, the son of perdition; (2Th 2:1-3)
  • 1 Timothy – Now the Spirit speaketh expressly, that in the latter times some shall depart from the faith, giving heed to seducing spirits, and doctrines of devils; Speaking lies in hypocrisy; having their conscience seared with a hot iron; (1Ti 4:1-2)
  • 2 Timothy – But shun profane and vain babblings: for they will increase unto more ungodliness. And their word will eat as doth a canker: of whom is Hymenaeus and Philetus; Who concerning the truth have erred, saying that the resurrection is past already; and overthrow the faith of some. (2Ti 2:16-18)
  • Titus – For there are many unruly and vain talkers and deceivers, specially they of the circumcision: Whose mouths must be stopped, who subvert whole houses, teaching things which they ought not, for filthy lucre’s sake. (Tit 1:10-11)
  • Hebrews – Be not carried about with divers and strange doctrines. For it is a good thing that the heart be established with grace; not with meats, which have not profited them that have been occupied therein. (Heb 13:9)
  • James – My brethren, be not many masters, knowing that we shall receive the greater condemnation. (Jas 3:1) (warning to those who would be teachers)
  • 1 Peter – The elders which are among you I exhort, who am also an elder, and a witness of the sufferings of Christ, and also a partaker of the glory that shall be revealed: Feed the flock of God which is among you, taking the oversight thereof, not by constraint, but willingly; not for filthy lucre, but of a ready mind; Neither as being lords over God’s heritage, but being ensamples to the flock. (1Pe 5:1-3)
  • 2 Peter – But there were false prophets also among the people, even as there shall be false teachers among you, who privily shall bring in damnable heresies, even denying the Lord that bought them, and bring upon themselves swift destruction. And many shall follow their pernicious ways; by reason of whom the way of truth shall be evil spoken of. And through covetousness shall they with feigned words make merchandise of you: whose judgment now of a long time lingereth not, and their damnation slumbereth not. (2Pe 2:1-3)
  • 1 John – Beloved, believe not every spirit, but try the spirits whether they are of God: because many false prophets are gone out into the world. (1Jn 4:1) They are of the world: therefore speak they of the world, and the world heareth them. We are of God: he that knoweth God heareth us; he that is not of God heareth not us. Hereby know we the spirit of truth, and the spirit of error. (1Jn 4:5-6)
  • 2 John – For many deceivers are entered into the world, who confess not that Jesus Christ is come in the flesh. This is a deceiver and an antichrist. Look to yourselves, that we lose not those things which we have wrought, but that we receive a full reward. Whosoever transgresseth, and abideth not in the doctrine of Christ, hath not God. He that abideth in the doctrine of Christ, he hath both the Father and the Son. If there come any unto you, and bring not this doctrine, receive him not into your house, neither bid him God speed: For he that biddeth him God speed is partaker of his evil deeds. (2Jn 1:7-11)
  • 3 John – I wrote unto the church: but Diotrephes, who loveth to have the preeminence among them, receiveth us not. Wherefore, if I come, I will remember his deeds which he doeth, prating against us with malicious words: and not content therewith, neither doth he himself receive the brethren, and forbiddeth them that would, and casteth them out of the church. Beloved, follow not that which is evil, but that which is good. He that doeth good is of God: but he that doeth evil hath not seen God. (3Jn 1:9-11)
  • Jude – For there are certain men crept in unawares, who were before of old ordained to this condemnation, ungodly men, turning the grace of our God into lasciviousness, and denying the only Lord God, and our Lord Jesus Christ. (Jud 1:4)
  • Revelation – I know thy works, and thy labour, and thy patience, and how thou canst not bear them which are evil: and thou hast tried them which say they are apostles, and are not, and hast found them liars: (Rev 2:2)

Aaron’s First Audio Drama

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ontheairWhat is your favorite evening family past time? One of our favorite things to do is to bring everyone into living room and read great books to the children. Although, I can’t really take credit as Dana does all the reading and I often fall asleep. While it is one of our favorite things to do, I admit that when the children were younger and life was slower that we did this much more often. But even now we still love to gather around a good book as a family, and if we can find a good one, we will on occasion listen to audio dramas during this time.

So, the other day Aaron (my 16 year old) said he was interested in learning about making audio dramas. One of the joys of homeschooling is that we can break from the normal routine to let our children pursue activities of interest. He picked a short chapter called Buried for his first attempt. This is the second book in The Peleg Chronicles by Matthew Christian Harding. We were introduced to this series a few years ago and they quickly became one of our family’s favorites. (You can read my review on the first book here.) Below is the 3 minute result of Aaron’s first attempt (with some help from a good friend).

After you listen to it I’d love to hear what you think.

Self-Deceit

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self conceit“I would never…”

“That happens to other people…”

“Thank God I’m not like that…”

“If that were me, I would…”

Have you ever spoken these words? I cringe just thinking about times in my life I have had similar thoughts. Over the years God has shown me the grievous sin of pride in my life. Today, He continues to remind me. It is pride that whispers, “I would never.” It is pride that says, “Thank God I’m not like that…” And it is the pride of life that without fail brings about destruction (Proverbs 16:18). This is why we are warned to not think more highly of ourselves than we ought.

For I say, through the grace given unto me, to every man that is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think; but to think soberly, according as God hath dealt to every man the measure of faith, Romans 12:3.

Am I above any sin? Isn’t this sinful flesh capable of anything? Couldn’t I fall just as easily as David, a man after God’s own heart, did – or even Abraham the friend of God? I believe so; we are all susceptible to falling into sin. But notice I said “falling.” Christians do not commit sin deliberately or consistently. It is against our new nature. As the Prince of Preachers said, “Sin murdered Christ; will you be a friend to it? Sin pierced the heart of the Incarnate God; can you love it?” No, as children of God we do not love sin. We hate everything about it. And we tremble at the slightest thought of committing deliberate sin. We do, however, fall into sin on occasion and it is wise to remember just how easy it is.

Wherefore let him that thinketh he standeth take heed lest he fall, 1 Corinthians 10:12.

It is for this reason we need one another. We need accountability.

Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted. Bear ye one another’s burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ.

But in this, let us never become prideful……

For if a man think himself to be something, when he is nothing, he deceiveth himself, Galatians 6:1-3.

A person who does not understand their own character can easily be deceived.

In truth, the better we know our own hearts, the more compassionate we are with others. The better we know our own hearts, the more on guard we are against sin. The better we know our own hearts, the more we trust in God alone. God resisteth the proud, but gives grace to the humble.

Help me, dear Lord, to be humble. I need Your grace. Help me to hate even the smallest amount of pride in my life. Help me Lord to understand how sinful I am and how righteous and holy You are. And may I never forget that self-conceit is but self-deceit.

“For if a man think himself to be something, when he is nothing, he deceiveth himself…..”

The Twilight Zone (Homeschool Edition)

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hs edition twilight The show never appealed to me much. I really don’t care for scary or creepy movies. Plus, frightening and sinister thoughts do not make Paul’s list to the Philippians of things we are to think upon (Philippians 4:8). However, the other day I felt like I stepped into the Twilight Zone.

It happened like this.

We were pleasantly surprised with 3 inches of snow last week. So like every good homeschool mom I suggested we put up the books, get out our coats and gloves, and go visit some friends. On the drive Abigail (my turns-14-in-a-few-weeks, wonderfully sweet, precious, a little OCD, and only daughter) said, “Mom, I’m NEVER going to get all my school work done!”

Where in the world did this come from? I was geared up for a fun day of visiting a friend over a cup of coffee while the kids played.

“Abigail, it will be okay,” I said, “We can take Friday to catch up on school this week.”

To which she replied, “We just take off too many days! It will be the middle of summer before I’m done with all my work.”

WOW! I was stunned. We take off too many days? What child says that? I’m a pretty relaxed homeschooling mom. We typically get all of our work done by Thursday, taking off Friday for errands, field trips, etc. Plus, we’re almost always finished with the school year by the end of May. I never wanted to be one of these “stick-to-the-schedule no matter what the cost” type of moms. I don’t want to “cram” lessons into my children, but let them enjoy learning. I don’t want to be ruled by the curriculum. I don’t want society, expectations, or anything other than the Lord and my husband dictating our weekly agenda. Homeschooling should be a lifestyle, not something we add-on to our life but who we are. Success isn’t gauged by finishing a book or taking a test, but whether or not I have given my children a love for the Lord and a love for learning.

“Would it make you feel better if you knew that some of the schools around closed for the day?” I said.

“Yea, a little”, my sweet daughter finally acknowledged.

The kids built a snowman, constructed a fort, had a snowball fight, drank hot chocolate and enjoyed the day. And that night, my daughter stayed up late doing her schoolwork.

We are quite opposite in many ways. She wants to stick to a schedule. I want to go with the flow. She wants all her schoolwork written down. I want to “do the next page.” She wants structure. I want freedom. She wants to sit at a desk with her books neatly stacked up. I want to work in the recliner or couch with a cup of coffee and my feet propped up. But I am so thankful for her. She’s just like her daddy, and the Lord knows that I need that structure here throughout the day. While I am certainly not an “unschooler,” I sure appreciate their style. But my daughter helps to create in me a beautiful balance.

Am I too relaxed? Maybe, just a bit!

Am I happy and enjoying my children and this wonderful season of life? Absolutely!

So now that I think about it, I didn’t step into the twilight zone at all. It was just a normal homeschool day where I learn as much as my children do.

snow kids snow day kids snow

Hey Girl, You Better Guard Your Heart!

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brokenheart There is a disturbing phenomenon circulating on Facebook and Pinterest. It is the “Hey Girl” photos with Ryan Gosling. Have you seen them? The pictures feature Mr. Gosling in a provocative pose, many times shirtless, addressing the very heart of women. The ones I have seen are disturbing in that they are geared toward wives, stay-at-home moms, and homeschoolers.

The photos have captions like:

• Hey girl, I loved your blog post today.
• Hey girl, Go rest those tired eyes and I’ll take care of the explosive diaper.
• Hey girl, You know I’m getting jealous of that body pillow.
• Hey girl, I don’t need fancy dinners, I love the way you cook Kraft dinners.
• Hey girl, sure I’ll take another day off from work to go on a field trip with you and the kids.
• Hey girl, I love how you manage to tie in our morning devotional with algebra.

In a society where marriages are under attack and fewer and fewer actually survive, the whole issue is troublesome. If it were a just a trend of the world I would not worry. But since many of my online associations are professing Christians, I have to conclude that many Christian wives are looking at and promoting these photos.

Faithfulness is key for a Christian marriage to not only thrive, but glorify God. No doubt marital infidelity can destroy a marriage, but what about infidelity of the heart?

Jesus said, “Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery: But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart,” Matthew 5:27-28.

Is it really prudent to look at a picture of a good-looking man saying things that you wish your husband would say?

Let’s ask like this: Would you want your husband looking at a picture of a good-looking woman saying things that he wished you would say to him?

The lies of the world are clever. They whisper, “It’s no big deal.” But, the enemy is subtle; he desires to destroy your marriage. Guard your heart; God is very concerned with the condition of it. Love your husband for who he is and glorify God through your marriage. The world is watching!

“Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life,” Proverbs 4:23.

The Importance of Teaching Ephesians 6:1-3

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eph 6Driving home with a friend the other day, we were talking about all the expectations placed on homeschool families. My friend, who is in the beginning stages of homeschooling, stated that she felt as though she had to prove something. This thought is normal. Often the world will look into our home and our choice of education and place lofty standards on us and our children. Sometimes, due to the “pride of life” (1 John 2:16), we raise the expectations ourselves. But if we could just lay the world’s standards and our own pride aside, we would find such freedom.

Homeschooling should be simple. It should be a lifestyle that creates in our children a love for God and learning along with a mindset of always pursuing knowledge. I have never wanted school to take place from 8 to 3 on Monday through Friday. I don’t want their education to just be from Kindergarten to 12th grade. I want my children learning every day of their life. Following the world’s standards will often lead to filling their minds with useless information. I don’t want to fill their minds; I want to shape their hearts and point them to God. I want to create in my children a desire to learn all they can for God’s glory. I want them to excel in reading good literature, to chase after truth in science, to discover the world through God’s eyes (HisStory), and I want them to use their writing and communication skills to change the world.

Simple right?

The concept of lifestyle teaching for God’s glory is certainly simple. It’s just hard at times. But isn’t all of parenting? A parent’s role in teaching their children is crucial. This is true whether or not we are homeschooling. So, with all the teaching we do, there is one imperative lesson that needs to be taught. This one lesson needs to be given first and foremost. It is found in Ephesians 6:1-3.

“Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. Honour thy father and mother; (which is the first commandment with promise;) That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth.”

This commandment is the foundation upon which successful teaching is built. Ephesians 6 gives two commands for children. They are to obey and honor. Obedience is an action. Honour is an attitude. It is to our children’s detriment if we fail to teach them this fundamental lesson. A child who does not learn to consistently obey their parents will struggle in life. It will not go well with them (Ephesians 6:3). They will also struggle in their academic studies if obedience is a problem. But even more important than that, if we fail to teach our children to honor and obey us, they will not learn how to honor and obey God. A lack of proper respect and obedience for those in authority will transcend into a lack of proper respect and obedience for the Highest Authority – God Almighty.

But society in general rebels against authority, doesn’t it? But like it or not, authority is a large part of life. We are always under some type of authority. Children must learn to submit to the authority of their parents. Christian wives must learn to submit to the authority of their own husbands. Husbands must learn to submit to the authority in the workplace. We all should submit to church and governmental authority. All believers must submit to God’s authority. Even unbelievers will one day submit. “For it is written, As I live, saith the Lord, every knee shall bow to me, and every tongue shall confess to God,” Romans 14:11. (Sadly, by the time an unbeliever learns to submit to God’s absolute authority it will be too late for them.) Submission to authority is a reality of life. And it is one that has been under attack since the beginning of time.

Today we see unnecessary heartache because of the lack of understanding biblical authority. There are miserable parents who have failed to teach this truth to their children and who are reaping the consequences. “The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame,” Proverbs 29:15. There are husbands and wives who are struggling in their marriage because they have never been taught proper authority or have simply chosen to ignore it. “Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it,” Ephesians 5:24-25. There are churches that are spiritually dying due to sin in the camp and a refusal to lovingly establish the authority of church discipline. “Your glorying is not good. Know ye not that a little leaven leaveneth the whole lump? Purge out therefore the old leaven, that ye may be a new lump, as ye are unleavened,” 1 Corinthians 5:6-7a. Untold numbers of boys and girls live in daily turmoil at home and with society because no one taught them the truth of authority. Thousands of men and women are in prison today because they did not submit to proper authority. Do you see the importance of authority?

The first four commandments given to Moses in Exodus 20 were between man and God, the next six between man and mankind. “Honour thy father and mother” was the first commandment that relates to our relationship with others. It was also the first commandment with promise – “thou mayest live long on the earth.” God saw this commandment as important. Don’t let your children disobey or dishonor you. It fabricates a weakness in their life that will be hard to overcome. Love them enough to teach them the importance of authority, honor, and obedience. In doing so, you will be pointing them to the Highest Authority – God Almighty.

14 Ways to Show Your Husband Respect (Part Two)

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part twoFold his eggs. Watch Finding Bigfoot with him. Write love notes and send sweet texts. These are ways to respect your husband. Click here to read Part One on 14 Ways to Show Your Husband Respect on Valentine’s Day.

Part Two continues:

Encourage the children to show honor to their father every day.

The first commandment with promise is “Honour thy father and thy mother, as the LORD thy God hath commanded thee; that thy days may be prolonged, and that it may go well with thee, in the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee,” Deuteronomy 5:16. One of the best things you can do for your husband is to teach his children to honor him in attitude and action. Teaching this also greatly impacts your children. If we don’t teach them to honor their earthly father, they will have a hard time learning how to honor their Heavenly Father. A lack of proper respect and obedience for those in authority will transcend into a lack of proper respect and obedience for the Highest Authority – God Almighty.

Don’t nag.

The strongest man who ever lived was nagged so much, “that his soul was vexed unto death,” Judges 16:16. Don’t be a nagging wife. It is very disrespectful and is more annoying than a leaky roof. “A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike,” Proverbs 27:15. Besides that, you will never change his heart or ways through nagging. Love him and win him over with a “meek and quiet spirit”, 1 Peter 3:4.

Smile at him often.

Have you ever seen a smiling face that was not beautiful? Smile at your husband and do it often. It will bless his heart. “A merry heart maketh a cheerful countenance,” Proverbs 15:13.

Pray for him daily.

Your husband carries a large load. He is responsible for his family physically and spiritually. He needs your prayers. It will strengthen your marriage and your love and respect for him. “Praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, and watching thereunto with all perseverance and supplication for all saints;” Ephesians 6:18.

Take an afternoon nap.

One of my dearest friends gave my some advice years ago that has transformed my marriage. She said, “Take an afternoon nap so that when your husband comes home you will have energy left for him.” You know how tired and exhausted you are at the end of the day. And it is quite easy to use up all of your energy before he comes home, so save some energy for him. If that means taking a nap – DO IT! He doesn’t want your leftovers. Respect him enough to take care of your body. Trust me on this one!

Dress in a way that pleases him.

I have a white jacket that my husband hates. I like it, but for some reason it reminds him of the 80’s. The other day I put it on over a dress and when I asked how I looked he responded with “okay”. Because he is always kind and gracious with his compliments, I know that “okay” is code for “not so good.” So, I took it off. Thinking back even now, I am sure that all my friends would agree that the jacket looked great. But is that really the point? My husband doesn’t like it. I think I will go right now and put it in box marked Give-Away.

Make building a godly marriage a priority.

Your marriage is the most important earthly thing you can build. Make it lasting. Make it strong. Be a testimony to this lost world. It will take work no doubt, so be willing to work hard at building a godly marriage. “Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD,” Proverbs 18:22. For more on building a godly marriage click here.

So there you have it. 14 Ways to Show Your Husband Respect on Valentine’s Day! Hope you enjoy it. Better yet, I hope your husband does! 😉

Many Blessings!

14 Ways to Show Your Husband Respect (Part One)

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heartFebruary 14th is a day of love and nothing speaks love to a husband like

R-E-S-P-E-C-T.

God knows the importance of respect in a marriage and reminds wives in Ephesians 5:33 “see that she reverence her husband.” Remember it isn’t about feelings or even because he deserves it. We respect our husbands because of their position in our marriage. The husband is the head of the wife. It’s not that he should be head, but that he is head, just as Christ is the head of the church (Ephesians 5:23).

Showing respect should be an everyday occurrence, and there is no time like Valentine’s Day to begin! Below are just a few practical ways to show reverence to your husband. Be creative, no two husbands are the same. However, I can confidently say that every husband wants respect.

Fold His Eggs. 

My husband loves eggs for breakfast and prefers them to be folded (like the eggs at McDonalds), not scrambled. It would be a lot quicker and easier to scramble eggs, but I take the time to fold them. Why? Because in preferring him, it shows that I love and respect his desires. Maybe your husband likes scrambled eggs; maybe he doesn’t like eggs at all. But I guarantee that he does have a favorite meal. Fix it for him and see his eyes light up!

Watch “Finding Bigfoot” with him.

I hate that show! I feel stupid just watching it. However, my husband deals with serious issues all day long. Many times he comes home exhausted and drained. So sometimes he just needs to relax and quite frankly, watch a stupid show. I fail, but I do my best to not complain. I sit by him, hold his hand, and patiently wait for those “scientist” to finally find a Sasquatch. Hopefully before too long they will so we can move on to something else. Perhaps watching “Finding Bigfoot” is not an issue for you. But I am sure that your husband enjoys activities that you don’t care for. Maybe it is fishing, playing golf, watching football. Do it with him on occasion. He’ll love you for it!

Write love notes or send sweet texts.

Taking the time to express your love to your husband is a great way to respect him. Tell him you appreciate all the hard work he does. Let him know that he is special to you. Tell him you are thinking of him. And on occasion, send a quick text to brighten up his day and make him look forward to coming home. Just be sure and send it to the right person!

Be understanding when he is late for dinner.

It happens. Sometimes it can’t be helped. Traffic is terrible or something unexpected comes up. And…..sometimes it can be helped. Either way, when we are forgiving with an understanding attitude it shows that we respect him. The golden rule found in Matthew 7:12 is a good guide for a happy marriage.

Iron his placket.

I often tell my husband that my love for him is like the laundry – It’s never-ending! It seems as though I iron all the time. And the plackets on his dress shirts always give me fits! But, it’s the little things I do that shows my husband respect. So if ironed plackets can accomplish that, so be it! What little thing can you do to show your husband that you care?

Speak highly of him in front of others.

“The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her.”Proverbs 31:11a. There is no better way to gain your husband’s trust and show respect than to praise him in front of others. Has he fixed the car? Does he take care of you when you’re sick? Does he bring you flowers? Does he work hard to provide for your family? Is he a good daddy? Honor him with your words. Death and life are in the power of the tongue and genuine words of appreciation will bring life to any marriage.

Argue with him in private.

No marriage is without arguments. You will not always agree with our husband, but you do not have to adamantly disagree in front of others, especially your children. If you disagree voice then your opinion in an honoring way, if the disagreement cannot be lovingly and respectfully resolved then work it out in private. Then you can come together, unified in front of the children.

So there you have it. Part One of 14 Ways to Show Respect to Your Husband on Valentine’s Day. Be watching tomorrow for part two.

“Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies. The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life,” Proverbs 31:10-12.

Building a Godly Marriage

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building houseI was reading this morning in Proverbs about the wise woman. I desire for my life to exude wisdom, no doubt every Christian woman does, so when I came across this verse it immediately caught my attention. “Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands,” Proverbs 14:1. Often in scripture parallels are drawn between the family and a house. Psalm 127 is a great example. The first verse says, “Except the Lord build the house, they labour in vain that build it.” Reading the chapter in context we easily see that the passage is speaking of the family. The following Psalm gives another example of the blessed man and his house. “Thy wife shall be as a fruitful vine by the sides of thine house: thy children like olive plants round about thy table,” Psalm 128:3. So, a wise woman builds her house, or we could say that she builds her family. But a foolish woman plucks it down.

A person does not have to know a lot about buildings, or even understand all the concepts behind construction, to know the most important aspect. If you want to build a structure that will last, it has to be built on a solid foundation. The only foundation solid enough to build a lasting marriage is Christ. As the old hymn goes, “all other ground is sinking sand”. Jesus Christ is the foundation of the Christian home. My husband and I have counseled with many Christian families who are falling apart. They might appear to be healthy and striving as a family, but it is just a façade. They have the foundation of Christ in their home, but they are building a weak, unsecured structure upon that foundation. Our enemy, the great deceiver, is seeking to destroy Christian families. If Christ is truly the foundation of the home, we rest in the peace that the foundation cannot be destroyed. The enemy knows this, but it does not keep him from seeking to destroy the framework of the home.

The framework of the Christian home is the marriage. Think about what happens when Christian marriages are destroyed. The home is shattered, churches are weakened, testimonies are lost, and the enemy is victorious when this happens. This is because the biblical marriage on earth is a picture to the world of the perfect heavenly marriage. We find this truth in Ephesians 5:22-32.

Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church: For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church.

When Christian marriages operate in an unbiblical fashion, they portray to the world a distorted and false view of Christ and His bride. I recognize that most couples do not think about their marriage in this light. Too many times they are so busy focusing on themselves for their testimony to the world to even be considered. But bearing in mind the current state of marriage within the Christian community, it’s high time that Christian people start thinking about these things. What is your marriage saying to those around you? As children of God, does your marriage reflect the power of God in your life? When the unsaved world looks at your marriage are they drawn to God and His glorious truths?

A wise woman will build her house. She starts with the correct foundation and builds a godly marriage from there. But a wife cannot do it alone. It will take work and commitment from both husband and wife. This is why God commands His children to “Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers,” 2 Corinthians 6:14a. It is imperative for a godly marriage. The picture is that through marriage my husband and I are yoked together or as Christ stated we are no longer two but one flesh. “(Jesus) said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder,” Matthew 19:5-6.

To pluck down or destroy my house would be to destroy myself, and that certainly would not be wise!

The Five Money Personalities & Book Give-a-Way

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moneyIn one way or another, money has an impact on a lot of decisions couples make together. Think about it. We often ask these questions: How much is it going to cost? Can we afford it? How much should we give? Will we go into debt? How can we get out of debt? Is it on sale? Will I get a pay raise or bonus? Should we eat at home or can we afford to go out? Will we shop at the mall or second hand stores? How much will we spend on our child’s birthday?
I would also say that money attributes to a lot of fights that couples have and in some cases even divorce. But, money is not bad in itself. It is the love of money that is the root of all evil, not money. However, wouldn’t it be great if we could live without the hassle of dealing with it? Unfortunately, we can’t.
Since we have to deal with money, it is wise to know what type of money personalities each of us have. Money personality? Yes, you have one. We all do. I recently read a book called The Five Money Personalities by Scott & Bethany Palmer. This money couple has dedicated their lives to helping other strengthen their relationships. With 43 years of combined financial planning experience, they launched “The Money Couple” and are regulars on national TV and radio and speak internationally about love and money.
The Five Money Personalities is an interesting book that explains the money personalities that each of us have. You and I are Spenders, Savers, Security Seekers, Risk Takers, or Flyers. More than likely, we are a combination of personalities. This book is not about money management or how to get out of debt. It’s all about relationships. I like that the focus is on the heart of the matter. It had practical advice on talking with your spouse about money and overcoming many money issue snares.
Interested in learning your money personality? Take this short online quiz here. If you want to read the book, leave a comment below and I’ll choose one person on February 1st to receive a new copy of The Five Money Personalities.

For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows. But thou, O man of God, flee these things; and follow after righteousness, godliness, faith, love, patience, meekness.
(1Ti 6:10-11)

money couple

Disclaimer:   I received a copy of this book to review in exchange for an honest product review.   I do not receive any other form of compensation for the reviews posted on this blog.