Tag: gifts

5 Gifts to Give our Children

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gifts
It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas! So, tis the season for malls, shopping, wrapping paper, gifts, bows, and ribbons! Maybe you prefer online shopping in your bathrobe with the internet, eBay and UPS. Or perhaps you prefer handmade gifts, baked goodies and homemade cards. But no matter how you look at it, this is the season for gift giving. Why? Most people probably give out of tradition. You are supposed to buy gifts at Christmas. Right? It is what has always been done. However, our family likes to look at gift giving a little differently. While it is a tradition at our home, it is one with a purpose. We give gifts as a reminder of the greatest gift ever given to mankind. I must admit that I love giving gifts to my children. But guess what? So does our heavenly Father!

“If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father which is in heaven give good things to them that ask him?” Matthew 7:11.

But toys and trinkets get broken, clothes get worn out and outgrown, electronics lose batteries and stop working, and the latest fad becomes next year’s obsolete. So I ask myself what can I give my children that will last? What type of gifts can I give that have true value? Listed below are 5 gifts that we can give our children that will never become broken or outdated.

TIME

In a world of busyness one of the most wonderful gifts we can give our children is time with them. December is probably the busiest month of the year for us. Between Thanksgiving and Christmas we go nonstop. There are people to visit, parties and programs to attend, Christmas cantata’s to practice for, gifts to make, shopping to do, etc. But life is short.

“Whereas ye know not what shall be on the morrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapour, that appeareth for a little time, and then vanisheth away.” James 4:14.

This truth is especially evident when it comes to children. They do not stay young forever. They grow up fast. As parents we only have a short time to invest in our children. We need to slow down and give our children something that will matter – time. Time with us, time to play games, time to talk, time to come apart from the world, time to meditate upon God, time to read together, and time to be a family. I have heard it said that the quantity of time does not matter as long as you give your children quality time. This is not true! Research has said that parents spend on average 3.5 minutes a day in meaningful conversation with their children. How sad! However, the average child watches 1,500 hours a year of TV. I guess if we want Hollywood to raise our children then this statistic would not bother us. But it bothers me. Turn off the TV and spend time with your children. Read to them at night, pray with them, and sing songs. When they grow up and look back at their life these are the things they will remember.

A PEACEFUL HOME

Another gift we can give our children is a home filled with peace. The world is hectic and noisy, but our homes should be a gentle haven of rest for our children. Our children should not have homes filled with screaming and shouting but with soft answers and love. The fruits of the Spirit should be manifested in our homes – love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, and temperance. A home filled with peace not only blesses our children but consider what a true witness it is to the world around us. Voddie Bauchman in Family Driven Faith states,

Our homes must be rife with the aroma of love. Those who visit us should notice immediately that they have left the world of self-serving egocentric narcissism and have entered a safe harbor where people value and esteem others above themselves. Outsiders should enter our homes and never want to leave. Our neighbors should find excuses to visit us just to get another whiff of the fragrant aroma of love. The brokenhearted should long to be near us. The down trodden and abused should seek us out. Families on the brink of disaster should point to us and say, ‘Why can’t our home be like that?’

This describes a home filled with peace. What a superb gift to give our children.

PARENTS WHO LOVE EACH OTHER

Another gift that is so overlooked in our modern culture is love in the home. It is given that we should love our children, but one of the best ways to love our children is to love God first and our spouse second. This speaks volumes to our children. Theodore Hesburgh is credited for saying, “The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother.” The focus of the family should be on the marriage. When parents are united the children are blessed. In addition, a strong marriage will strengthen our children’s faith as it is a testimony to the world for God’s glory.

“My little children, let us not love in word, neither in tongue; but in deed and in truth,” 1 John 3:18.

CHARACTER TRAITS

While giving gifts let’s not forget the gift of hard work & diligence. Society will tell a child that you should do as little as possible to get as much as possible. It is this fallacy of thinking that has leads to a lazy and entitlement mentality. But, give your children the gift of learning how to work hard and they will always be able to thrive. In addition, it is pleasing to the Lord.

“And whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men;” Colossians 3:23.

Another character trait this is desperately needed in today’s society is inner beauty, especially when it comes to our daughters. Godly women are not born, but raised. Many mothers concern themselves over whether their daughters have fashionable clothes and the latest styles. Many would be alarmed if their daughters wore dirty clothes. But how many mothers care if their daughter has a filthy heart? To teach and train our daughters about inner beauty that is acceptable to God is a divine gift we can give.

“Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised,” Proverbs 31:30.

(There are many character traits that we can help to instill in our children. So by no means is this list inclusive. But hard work, diligence and inner beauty are a great place to start.)

BIBLICAL STANDARDS TO LIVE BY

There are many gifts we can give our children. But one that is of utmost importance is to give your children biblical standards to live by. As Christian parents we should not want for our children what every other parent wants. We shouldn’t hold them to the world’s standards but to God’s standards. Do you want your children to make the team? What about them making it into the Lambs book of life? Do you want them to get a good education? What about them being educated in the Word of God? Do you want them to be true and loyal to their friends? What about your children being faithful to the Lord and His Church? Do you want your children to be popular? What about them being peculiar? God’s ways are always higher.

“And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed,” Romans 12:2a.

Christian parent, there are many worthwhile pursuits in this world, but few rise to the level of training our children to follow the Lord, to love Him with all we are, to treasure His Word, and to keep His commandments. When we do this we have given our children gifts that never tear up, get worn, or get taken away.

So, this holiday season I’ll be looking for presents for my children and wrapping packages like many others. But the most precious gifts I’ll strive to give them will not be the ones that come in a box. Instead, the gifts I will strive to give will be of eternal value.

Merry Christmas!

5 Ways to say “I Love You!”

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With Valentine’s Day just around the corner, the card, chocolate, and flower industries are prospering.  Everyone wants to show their loved ones just how much they truly love them.  But let me ask.  Is this the best way to show our love?  Sure, it is nice to get a card, some chocolate, or a vase of flowers on Valentine’s Day.   But is it really necessary? 

Do not get me wrong.  I love getting flowers and such from my husband.  But I love getting them much more “just because”.  There are two reasons for this.  The first is that the “just because” are not expected.  They are just because he is thinking of me and wants to show his love.  The second reason is that these industries usually increase their prices this time of year.  And I hate having money wasted.

So, what is one to do?  After all, it would be incredibly disheartening to just ignore an extra opportunity to show some love.  We could buy things for our family and they could buy things for us.  But, I’ve put together a list of five ways that we can show our husband or children just how much we love them without spending a dime.

Writing – It stands to reason that a writer would list writing first.  It just makes so much sense.  First of all, when you take the time to write something down it means more.  It is longer lasting.  I’ve written many poems for my husband and family.  One year I made an acrostic poem of my children’s names.  I simply listed attributes about them beginning with the letters of their names.  Maybe poetry is not your expertise.  Don’t despair.   A simple letter that they could hold on to would speak volumes.  I have learned that very few men care about poetry.  They do, however, want to be respected.  So, make a list for your husband of all the reason’s you respect him.  Tell him he’s doing a good job.  Let him know he’s a good father.  Thank him for providing for you every day.  My husband has told other men to go to Wal-mart and copy down a Halmark card word for word.  I won’t comment on that! But I will say that there is nothing sweeter than a hand written note.

Baking – Sure you can go to the store and buy cupcakes or cookies.  But there is always one ingredient the stores leave out – love.  Sure you can go out, wait in line for two hours, and share a fancy meal at an expensive restaurant with dozens of other couples but where is the romance in that?  One sure way to let your loved ones know you care is to bake them something.  Pancakes for breakfast with chocolate chips are one way to give my children something special.  One year I took some chocolate and melted it down.  I then took wooden skewers and made chocolate heart suckers for my children.  A little time and $3 later I was their hero!  A frozen pizza is particularly special for my husband!  No, not for him to eat but for the children.  You see, I can fix us a special romantic meal and send the children to another room with a frozen pizza and a movie.  They are happy to get a special treat.  We are happy to have some special time.  Everyone wins!  Does your husband have a favorite meal or dessert?  Make it for him.  He’ll love you for it! 

  Investing – Nothing articulates love like time!  Invest some time into your children.  Play a game with them.  Color with them.  Read a book together.  Help them make a tent in the living room.  Just spend time with them.  And, after spending time with them put them to bed early and spend time with your husband.  My husband and I like to take walks together.  We stay close to the house, hold hands, and walk.  It’s wonderful.  If you have a busy day scheduled make the effort to get up 15 minutes early and linger over a cup of coffee together.  It will set the tone for the rest of the day.  Keep some white space on your calendar for your family.  It shows them you love them!

 Organizing – One day my children and I spent an afternoon cleaning out and organizing their daddy’s closet.  We even categorized his dress shirts by color.  He was so thrilled!  Sometimes I surprise him and we clean out and vacuum his car.  Doing little things for others is a big way to show love.  Does your husband have a desk, a work area, or a shed that needs some attention?  Surprise him and organize it.  What about your children’s bedrooms?  We expect our children to be responsible for their own rooms.  It is their job to clean them.  And maybe you have extremely neat and organized children who keep their rooms perfectly clutter free.  I don’t.  My children for some reason think that the trash can is under the bed.  So every now and then (for no other reason than because I love them) I help them organize their rooms.  A little help goes a long way.

Praying – So far I have listed ways to show our family we love them with our hands – writing, baking, investing, and organizing.  But this next one is not something we do with our hands.  We do it on our knees.  One of the greatest ways to show you love your family is to pray earnestly for them.  Pray for your husband, that God would lead him as he leads his family.  Pray that God gives him wisdom.  Pray that God would bless him.  Pray for your children. Pray for their salvation, pray for their protection, pray for their health, and pray for their future.  Pray that God will work mightily in your family.    Prayer is a great gift that shows great love.  Your family may not ever know about it but the effects are eternal.

This list is not exclusive.  There are many ways to show love to your family.  Be creative.  And have a blessed Valentine’s Day!

We love him, because he first loved us. (1John 4:19)

 But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. Much more then, being now justified by his blood, we shall be saved from wrath through him. For if, when we were enemies, we were reconciled to God by the death of his Son, much more, being reconciled, we shall be saved by his life. (Romans 5:8-10)

 

Gift Giving

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Tis the season for malls, shopping, wrapping paper, gifts, bows, and ribbons.  Maybe you prefer online shopping in your bathrobe with the internet, eBay and UPS.  Or perhaps you prefer handmade gifts, baked goodies and homemade cards.  But no matter how you look at it this is the season for gift giving.  Why?  Most people probably give out of tradition.  You are supposed to buy gifts at Christmas.  It is what has always been done.  However, our family likes to look at gift giving a little differently.  While it is a tradition at our home it is one with a purpose.  We give gifts as a reminder of the greatest gift ever given to mankind.  I must admit that I love giving gifts to my children.  But toys and trinkets get broken, clothes get worn out and outgrown, electronics lose batteries and stop working, and the latest fad becomes next year’s obsolete.  So I ask myself what can I give my children that will last?  What type of gifts can I give that have true value?

In a world of busyness one of the most wonderful gifts we can give our children is TIME.  December is probably the busiest month of the year for us.  Between Thanksgiving and Christmas we go nonstop.  There are people to visit, parties and programs to attend, Christmas cantata’s to practice for, gifts to make, shopping to do, etc.   But life is short.  Whereas ye know not what shall be on the morrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapour, that appeareth for a little time, and then vanisheth away. (Jas 4:14)   This truth is especially evident when it comes to children.  They do not stay young forever.  They grow up fast.  As parents we only have a short time to invest in our children.  We need to slow down and give our children something that will matter – time.  Time with us, time to play games, time to talk, time to come apart from the world, time to meditate upon God, time to read together,  and time to be a family.  I have heard it said that the quantity of time does not matter as long as you give your children quality time.   This is not true!  Research has said that parents spend on average 3.5 minutes a day in meaningful conversation with their children.  How sad!  However, the average child watches 1,500 hours a year of TV.  I guess if you want Hollywood to raise your children then this statistic would not bother you.  But dear Christian parent is should bother you.  Turn off the TV and spend TIME with your children.  Read to them at night, pray with them, and sing songs.  When they grow up and look back at their life these are the things they will remember.

 Another gift we can give our children is a home filled with PEACE.  The world is hectic and noisy but our homes should be a gentle haven of rest for our children.  Our children should not have homes filled with screaming and shouting but with soft answers and love.  The fruits of the Spirit should be manifested in our homes – love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, and temperance.  A home filled with peace not only blesses our children but consider what a true witness it is to the world around us.  Voddie Bauchman in Family Driven Faith states, “Our homes must be rife with the aroma of love.  Those who visit us should notice immediately that they have left the world of self-serving egocentric narcissism and have entered a safe harbor where people value and esteem others above themselves.  Outsiders should enter our homes and never want to leave.  Our neighbors should find excuses to visit us just to get another whiff of the fragrant aroma of love.  The brokenhearted should long to be near us.  The down trodden and abused should seek us out.  Families on the brink of disaster should point to us and say, ‘Why can’t our home be like that?’”  This describes a home filled with PEACE.   What a superb gift to give our children.

 Another gift that is so overlooked in our modern culture is the gift of LOVING and RESPECTING the children’s father.  While loving your children is a given, a high value placed on loving their father is often ignored.  Notice the order of things that the older women are to be teaching the younger women mentioned in Titus 2:4-5, “That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.”   The focus of the family should be on the marriage.  Children are in the home for a short time and the relationship they have with their parents change but this is not so in the husband and wife relationship.  When parents are united the children are blessed.  When I demonstrate to my children proper LOVE and RESPECT for my husband God is glorified and the children’s faith is strengthened. 

 While giving gifts let’s not forget the gift of HARDWORK.  Society will tell a child that you should do as little as possible to get as much as possible.  It is this fallacy of thinking that has led to lazy people and an abuse of our welfare system.   But, give your children the gift of learning how to work hard and they will always be able to thrive.  In addition, it is pleasing to the Lord.  And whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men; (Col 3:23)       

One of the greatest gifts we can give is the gift of INNER BEAUTY, especially when it comes to our daughters.  Godly women are not born, but raised.  There are many mothers concerned over whether their daughters have fashionable clothes and the latest styles.  And many mothers would be alarmed if their daughters were wearing dirty clothes.  But how many mothers care if their daughter has a filthy heart?  To teach and train our daughters about inner beauty that is acceptable to God is a divine gift we can give.  Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised. (Proverbs 31:30)

 There are many gifts we can give our children.  But one that is of utmost importance is to give your children BIBLICAL STANDARDS to live by.  As Christian parents we should not want for our children what every other parent wants.  We shouldn’t hold them to the world’s standards but to God’s standards.  Do you want your children to make the team?   What about them making it into the Lambs book of life?  Do you want them to get a good education?  What about them being educated in the Word of God?  Do you want them to be true and loyal to their friends?  What about your children being faithful to the Lord and His Church?  Do you want your children to be popular?  What about them being peculiar?  God’s ways are always higher.   “And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed” (Rom 12:2a).  Christian parent, there are many worthwhile pursuits in this world but few rise to the level of training our children to follow the Lord, to love Him with all we are, to treasure His Word, and to keep His commandments.  When we do this we have given our children gifts that never tear up, get worn, or get taken away.

 So, this holiday season I’ll be looking for presents for my children and wrapping packages like many others.  But the most precious gifts I’ll strive to give them will not be the ones that come in a box.  Instead, the gifts I will strive to give will be of eternal value.