Hey Girl, You Better Guard Your Heart!

brokenheart There is a disturbing phenomenon circulating on Facebook and Pinterest. It is the “Hey Girl” photos with Ryan Gosling. Have you seen them? The pictures feature Mr. Gosling in a provocative pose, many times shirtless, addressing the very heart of women. The ones I have seen are disturbing in that they are geared toward wives, stay-at-home moms, and homeschoolers.

The photos have captions like:

• Hey girl, I loved your blog post today.
• Hey girl, Go rest those tired eyes and I’ll take care of the explosive diaper.
• Hey girl, You know I’m getting jealous of that body pillow.
• Hey girl, I don’t need fancy dinners, I love the way you cook Kraft dinners.
• Hey girl, sure I’ll take another day off from work to go on a field trip with you and the kids.
• Hey girl, I love how you manage to tie in our morning devotional with algebra.

In a society where marriages are under attack and fewer and fewer actually survive, the whole issue is troublesome. If it were a just a trend of the world I would not worry. But since many of my online associations are professing Christians, I have to conclude that many Christian wives are looking at and promoting these photos.

Faithfulness is key for a Christian marriage to not only thrive, but glorify God. No doubt marital infidelity can destroy a marriage, but what about infidelity of the heart?

Jesus said, “Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery: But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart,” Matthew 5:27-28.

Is it really prudent to look at a picture of a good-looking man saying things that you wish your husband would say?

Let’s ask like this: Would you want your husband looking at a picture of a good-looking woman saying things that he wished you would say to him?

The lies of the world are clever. They whisper, “It’s no big deal.” But, the enemy is subtle; he desires to destroy your marriage. Guard your heart; God is very concerned with the condition of it. Love your husband for who he is and glorify God through your marriage. The world is watching!

“Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life,” Proverbs 4:23.

The Importance of Teaching Ephesians 6:1-3

eph 6Driving home with a friend the other day, we were talking about all the expectations placed on homeschool families. My friend, who is in the beginning stages of homeschooling, stated that she felt as though she had to prove something. This thought is normal. Often the world will look into our home and our choice of education and place lofty standards on us and our children. Sometimes, due to the “pride of life” (1 John 2:16), we raise the expectations ourselves. But if we could just lay the world’s standards and our own pride aside, we would find such freedom.

Homeschooling should be simple. It should be a lifestyle that creates in our children a love for God and learning along with a mindset of always pursuing knowledge. I have never wanted school to take place from 8 to 3 on Monday through Friday. I don’t want their education to just be from Kindergarten to 12th grade. I want my children learning every day of their life. Following the world’s standards will often lead to filling their minds with useless information. I don’t want to fill their minds; I want to shape their hearts and point them to God. I want to create in my children a desire to learn all they can for God’s glory. I want them to excel in reading good literature, to chase after truth in science, to discover the world through God’s eyes (HisStory), and I want them to use their writing and communication skills to change the world.

Simple right?

The concept of lifestyle teaching for God’s glory is certainly simple. It’s just hard at times. But isn’t all of parenting? A parent’s role in teaching their children is crucial. This is true whether or not we are homeschooling. So, with all the teaching we do, there is one imperative lesson that needs to be taught. This one lesson needs to be given first and foremost. It is found in Ephesians 6:1-3.

“Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. Honour thy father and mother; (which is the first commandment with promise;) That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth.”

This commandment is the foundation upon which successful teaching is built. Ephesians 6 gives two commands for children. They are to obey and honor. Obedience is an action. Honour is an attitude. It is to our children’s detriment if we fail to teach them this fundamental lesson. A child who does not learn to consistently obey their parents will struggle in life. It will not go well with them (Ephesians 6:3). They will also struggle in their academic studies if obedience is a problem. But even more important than that, if we fail to teach our children to honor and obey us, they will not learn how to honor and obey God. A lack of proper respect and obedience for those in authority will transcend into a lack of proper respect and obedience for the Highest Authority – God Almighty.

But society in general rebels against authority, doesn’t it? But like it or not, authority is a large part of life. We are always under some type of authority. Children must learn to submit to the authority of their parents. Christian wives must learn to submit to the authority of their own husbands. Husbands must learn to submit to the authority in the workplace. We all should submit to church and governmental authority. All believers must submit to God’s authority. Even unbelievers will one day submit. “For it is written, As I live, saith the Lord, every knee shall bow to me, and every tongue shall confess to God,” Romans 14:11. (Sadly, by the time an unbeliever learns to submit to God’s absolute authority it will be too late for them.) Submission to authority is a reality of life. And it is one that has been under attack since the beginning of time.

Today we see unnecessary heartache because of the lack of understanding biblical authority. There are miserable parents who have failed to teach this truth to their children and who are reaping the consequences. “The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame,” Proverbs 29:15. There are husbands and wives who are struggling in their marriage because they have never been taught proper authority or have simply chosen to ignore it. “Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it,” Ephesians 5:24-25. There are churches that are spiritually dying due to sin in the camp and a refusal to lovingly establish the authority of church discipline. “Your glorying is not good. Know ye not that a little leaven leaveneth the whole lump? Purge out therefore the old leaven, that ye may be a new lump, as ye are unleavened,” 1 Corinthians 5:6-7a. Untold numbers of boys and girls live in daily turmoil at home and with society because no one taught them the truth of authority. Thousands of men and women are in prison today because they did not submit to proper authority. Do you see the importance of authority?

The first four commandments given to Moses in Exodus 20 were between man and God, the next six between man and mankind. “Honour thy father and mother” was the first commandment that relates to our relationship with others. It was also the first commandment with promise – “thou mayest live long on the earth.” God saw this commandment as important. Don’t let your children disobey or dishonor you. It fabricates a weakness in their life that will be hard to overcome. Love them enough to teach them the importance of authority, honor, and obedience. In doing so, you will be pointing them to the Highest Authority – God Almighty.

14 Ways to Show Your Husband Respect (Part Two)

part twoFold his eggs. Watch Finding Bigfoot with him. Write love notes and send sweet texts. These are ways to respect your husband. Click here to read Part One on 14 Ways to Show Your Husband Respect on Valentine’s Day.

Part Two continues:

Encourage the children to show honor to their father every day.

The first commandment with promise is “Honour thy father and thy mother, as the LORD thy God hath commanded thee; that thy days may be prolonged, and that it may go well with thee, in the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee,” Deuteronomy 5:16. One of the best things you can do for your husband is to teach his children to honor him in attitude and action. Teaching this also greatly impacts your children. If we don’t teach them to honor their earthly father, they will have a hard time learning how to honor their Heavenly Father. A lack of proper respect and obedience for those in authority will transcend into a lack of proper respect and obedience for the Highest Authority – God Almighty.

Don’t nag.

The strongest man who ever lived was nagged so much, “that his soul was vexed unto death,” Judges 16:16. Don’t be a nagging wife. It is very disrespectful and is more annoying than a leaky roof. “A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike,” Proverbs 27:15. Besides that, you will never change his heart or ways through nagging. Love him and win him over with a “meek and quiet spirit”, 1 Peter 3:4.

Smile at him often.

Have you ever seen a smiling face that was not beautiful? Smile at your husband and do it often. It will bless his heart. “A merry heart maketh a cheerful countenance,” Proverbs 15:13.

Pray for him daily.

Your husband carries a large load. He is responsible for his family physically and spiritually. He needs your prayers. It will strengthen your marriage and your love and respect for him. “Praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, and watching thereunto with all perseverance and supplication for all saints;” Ephesians 6:18.

Take an afternoon nap.

One of my dearest friends gave my some advice years ago that has transformed my marriage. She said, “Take an afternoon nap so that when your husband comes home you will have energy left for him.” You know how tired and exhausted you are at the end of the day. And it is quite easy to use up all of your energy before he comes home, so save some energy for him. If that means taking a nap – DO IT! He doesn’t want your leftovers. Respect him enough to take care of your body. Trust me on this one!

Dress in a way that pleases him.

I have a white jacket that my husband hates. I like it, but for some reason it reminds him of the 80’s. The other day I put it on over a dress and when I asked how I looked he responded with “okay”. Because he is always kind and gracious with his compliments, I know that “okay” is code for “not so good.” So, I took it off. Thinking back even now, I am sure that all my friends would agree that the jacket looked great. But is that really the point? My husband doesn’t like it. I think I will go right now and put it in box marked Give-Away.

Make building a godly marriage a priority.

Your marriage is the most important earthly thing you can build. Make it lasting. Make it strong. Be a testimony to this lost world. It will take work no doubt, so be willing to work hard at building a godly marriage. “Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD,” Proverbs 18:22. For more on building a godly marriage click here.

So there you have it. 14 Ways to Show Your Husband Respect on Valentine’s Day! Hope you enjoy it. Better yet, I hope your husband does! 😉

Many Blessings!

Building a Godly Marriage

building houseI was reading this morning in Proverbs about the wise woman. I desire for my life to exude wisdom, no doubt every Christian woman does, so when I came across this verse it immediately caught my attention. “Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands,” Proverbs 14:1. Often in scripture parallels are drawn between the family and a house. Psalm 127 is a great example. The first verse says, “Except the Lord build the house, they labour in vain that build it.” Reading the chapter in context we easily see that the passage is speaking of the family. The following Psalm gives another example of the blessed man and his house. “Thy wife shall be as a fruitful vine by the sides of thine house: thy children like olive plants round about thy table,” Psalm 128:3. So, a wise woman builds her house, or we could say that she builds her family. But a foolish woman plucks it down.

A person does not have to know a lot about buildings, or even understand all the concepts behind construction, to know the most important aspect. If you want to build a structure that will last, it has to be built on a solid foundation. The only foundation solid enough to build a lasting marriage is Christ. As the old hymn goes, “all other ground is sinking sand”. Jesus Christ is the foundation of the Christian home. My husband and I have counseled with many Christian families who are falling apart. They might appear to be healthy and striving as a family, but it is just a façade. They have the foundation of Christ in their home, but they are building a weak, unsecured structure upon that foundation. Our enemy, the great deceiver, is seeking to destroy Christian families. If Christ is truly the foundation of the home, we rest in the peace that the foundation cannot be destroyed. The enemy knows this, but it does not keep him from seeking to destroy the framework of the home.

The framework of the Christian home is the marriage. Think about what happens when Christian marriages are destroyed. The home is shattered, churches are weakened, testimonies are lost, and the enemy is victorious when this happens. This is because the biblical marriage on earth is a picture to the world of the perfect heavenly marriage. We find this truth in Ephesians 5:22-32.

Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church: For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church.

When Christian marriages operate in an unbiblical fashion, they portray to the world a distorted and false view of Christ and His bride. I recognize that most couples do not think about their marriage in this light. Too many times they are so busy focusing on themselves for their testimony to the world to even be considered. But bearing in mind the current state of marriage within the Christian community, it’s high time that Christian people start thinking about these things. What is your marriage saying to those around you? As children of God, does your marriage reflect the power of God in your life? When the unsaved world looks at your marriage are they drawn to God and His glorious truths?

A wise woman will build her house. She starts with the correct foundation and builds a godly marriage from there. But a wife cannot do it alone. It will take work and commitment from both husband and wife. This is why God commands His children to “Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers,” 2 Corinthians 6:14a. It is imperative for a godly marriage. The picture is that through marriage my husband and I are yoked together or as Christ stated we are no longer two but one flesh. “(Jesus) said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder,” Matthew 19:5-6.

To pluck down or destroy my house would be to destroy myself, and that certainly would not be wise!

The “New” Front Porch

My husband’s first church was in a little town in central Arkansas (population 202).  It was a quaint little town, stuck in the 50’s.  We knew all of our neighbors.  People waved as they drove past.  Those walking down the street would stop and talk to you.  We went to Crime Watch and played softball at the park.  I did aerobics at the community center and my husband was on the volunteer fire department.  Everyone in the town knew you and you knew everyone in the town.  People didn’t need an invitation to stop by for a visit.  My family loved living there and living in a “glass house” didn’t bother us.  We wanted our church to know that we were the same in our home as well as outside in the community.  Everyone had a front porch and we would often find them sitting on it.  In fact, my first Ladies Bible study was held on a front porch.  One mid-morning Tuesday a dozen ladies gathered up for a luncheon, sweet tea, and the Word of God.    Living there was a good experience for us.

Today we live in a far different atmosphere.  I do not know my neighbors.  In fact, since we’ve lived in town, we have had a hard time meeting even our next door neighbors.  People are busy.  Garage doors stay closed.  Blinds stay shut.  No one sits on their front porch because no one has a front porch.  Sometimes we hear our neighbors in their backyard, but even that is seldom.  Several months ago we tried to meet our new neighbors who just moved in.  My husband took over a plate of homemade chocolate chip cookies to welcome them into our neighborhood.  As it turned out, it was the cleaning people.  They enjoyed the cookies, I’m sure.

It is though people do not want to be known.  “I have my own life.  Leave me alone.  Don’t bother me.”

That is until they get online……..

You see, it’s not that people don’t necessarily want to get to know people.  It’s just that they don’t want to get to know them face to face.  They don’t want to sit on their front porch and visit with a neighbor over a cup of coffee.  That takes too much time.  It’s too much of an investment.  There is a risk associated with it.  It involves real people.

But, the “new” front porch is a different story.  This front porch can be anywhere.  It can be in your bedroom, the car, at work, during church service, at the doctor’s office, or on the playground.  In fact, on those rare occasions when we are actually visiting with someone face to face, we can still be sitting on our own “front porch” interacting with someone entirely different.  This new front porch has many names.  You might recognize it at Facebook, Twitter, Skype, texting, or basically any type of social networking and virtual connections.  It really is a strange phenomenon.  There are people who will not take 3 seconds to look another person in the eyes when greeted.  Yet, these same people will tell the whole world all the happenings of their day.  We know what they ate for breakfast, where their spent their last dollar, what games they play online, what TV shows they are watching, the status of their ingrown toenail, and all their personal problems.  There are people who have 4,000 “friends” online, yet could not name 3 “real” friends who would be there if needed.  They will proudly announce to the world their private sins in the form of a status update, yet would never dream of confessing their faults to the church (James 5:16).

Indeed there is a façade associated with the “new” front porch, but is it more ominous than all of that?  My concern is toward the Christian community.  Has all of this online interaction become a surrogate church of sorts?  Let me explain.  Just today I was reading a post by a young mother who was pouring out her heart and begging for encouragement from others in this certain online group.  My heart immediately went out to her, but not necessarily because she was having family troubles.  I was sad for her because it appeared that she did not have anyone (other than an online Christian group) to talk to.  What a sad commentary for the local church.  Tell me, can someone typing ((hugs)) really replace a friends presence?

Like so much of technology there are pro’s and con’s associated it.  I like Facebook.  I love seeing pictures of my family and friends.  I like being able to seed messages and connect with those I know.  I enjoy being able to send a short text to someone.  It simplifies communicating.  Emails are great.  I would much rather type a letter to a friend than take the time to write one out on paper, it’s faster.  And Skype sure comes in handy when my husband and I travel.  We can still see the children, pray with them, and tell them goodnight “face to face.”  Technology should enhance communication; it should not replace it.

As with all of technology there is a fine line.  Do we embrace it or shut it off?  I think I will invited a friend over for a cup of coffee and sit outside on the deck to discuss it.  Some “real people” interaction sounds nice.  On second thought, I’m too busy for that today.  So, I think I’ll throw this up online.  If you want to sit on my “front porch” for a while leave a comment.

Blessings!

From Darkness to Light

I asked my Christian friends to take a serious look at the upcoming election in my last post.  One of the questions I asked was whether a Mormon was truly a Christian.  I wrote this because the only talk I seem to hear in some Christian circles is that Mitt Romney, a Mormon, is the “only” hope for Christians in this upcoming election.  It concerns me that those on the Christian right are placing so much hope in a man who worships a false god.    My response is simply that “It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man,” Psalm 118:8.  However, many Christians lean toward a pragmatic view, reaching after what seems to work and completely ignoring whether it is right or not.   Too many times we view our political choices and our faith as separate matters.  As the people of God, could we please get back to absolutes?  You know…right and wrong…light and darkness…truth and lies…  There is an unyielding warning to those who don’t.  “Woe unto them that call evil good, and good evil; that put darkness for light, and light for darkness; that put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter! Woe unto them that are wise in their own eyes, and prudent in their own sight!” (Isa 5:20-21)

I know there are still those who scoff and think that voting for a Mormon for President is no big deal.  All I ask is that you do some research and look into what the Mormons truly believe.  After my last post I was introduced to a young lady who visited my blog.  She has an incredible testimony about coming out of Mormonism.  It’s her heart’s desire to share it with others who are entangled in cults and false teaching.  I encourage each of you to take the time to read it.  You can see it here.  You also might want to read her post called, They Use Christian Words.  It is very interesting.

As I have said many times before, God in His sovereignty has already determined this election. His will is always accomplished.  I just wonder if the results will be His judgment upon us.  They, of course, don’t have to be.

If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land. (2Ch 7:14)

Who can tell if God will turn and repent, and turn away from his fierce anger, that we perish not? And God saw their works, that they turned from their evil way; and God repented of the evil, that he had said that he would do unto them; and he did it not.  (Jon 3:9-10)

A Christian’s Response to the Upcoming Election

My last post talked about consequences and I am afraid that this next election will hold grave consequences.  So what should a Christian’s response be to the upcoming election?   It appears that our options for voting are between current President Obama and Mitt Romney.  I’m not even going to address the President’s policies these last 3 ½ years.  Let his actions speak for himself.  I’m also not going to address that fact that Mitt Romney is not a career politician (which I believe is a great asset) or his apparent values.  Laying all political, financial, and moral views aside, I want to address something different.  Should a Christian vote for a candidate who is not a Christian?

Regardless of how the media likes to spin the issue, the truth from God’s Word is that, “by their fruits ye shall know them” (Matthew 7:20).  Evaluate for yourself the “fruits” produced by our current President who strongly supports the murder of innocent babies and homosexual marriage.

So I ask the next question.  Is Mitt Romney, a faithful member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, a Christian?  While I cannot know his heart, I can look at the Mormon religion as a whole.

The Institute for Religious Research has a page on the Mormon religion (http://mit.irr.org/mormonism-christian-2) that explains the basic beliefs of Mormons.  Below are a few, but not all, of Mormon beliefs.

  • Many gods made the world (Abraham 4:1-31)
  • God the Father was once a man (LDS Church teaches that Jesus Christ, humans, angels, and fallen spirits including Satan are all eternal beings that were never created and that are all spirit brothers and sisters. In particular, Christ and Lucifer (Satan) were two spirit brothers; Christ supported Heavenly Father’s plan while Lucifer did not.)
  • Adam’s sin was “a necessary step in the plan of life and a great blessing to all of us” (Book of Mormon—2 Nephi 2:14-26; Book of Moses 5:10-12)
  • Mormonism teaches that a person must become worthy in order to obtain forgiveness of sins and eternal life in the presence of God the Father through obedience to all the commands of the LDS Church (Book of Mormon—2 Nephi 25:23;
  • LDS Church teaches that the Bible has been corrupted, is missing many “plain and precious parts,” and does not contain the fullness of the gospel (1 Nephi 13:26-29)
  •  LDS Church teaches that faithful Mormons who fulfill all of their spiritual, moral, and ritual obligations can eventually attain the status of gods, beings of the same essential nature as God the Father ruling over their own worlds. “As man now is, God once was: As God now is, man may be” (Lorenzo Snow, in Presidents of the Church: Student Manual [2004], 88, 90; Gospel Fundamentals [2001], 201; Gospel Principles [2009], 275-79; Teachings of Presidents of the Church: George Albert Smith [2011], 71).

The Mormonism Research Ministry has compiled this list. (http://www.mrm.org/god-of-mormonism)

  •  The god of Mormonism is one of many gods.
  • The god of Mormonism is not self-existent.
  • The god of Mormonism is not transcendent.
  • The god of Mormonism is not immutable.
  • The god of Mormonism is not eternally God.
  • The god of Mormonism is not incorporeal.
  • The god of Mormonism is not omnipresent.
  • The god of Mormonism cannot dwell in the believer.
  • The god of Mormonism is not omnipotent.
  • The god of Mormonism does not forgive completely.

In his famous “King Follett Discourse” Joseph Smith (prophet, teacher, and leader of the saints) taught,

“God himself was once as we are now, and is an exalted man, and sits enthroned in yonder heavens. That is the great secret… [Y]ou have got to learn how to be Gods yourselves, and to be kings and priests to God, the same as all Gods have done before you…”

According to www.mormon.org in addition to the Bible, Latter-day Saints accept the following books as scripture:

  • The Book of Mormon: Another Testament of Jesus Christ, a record of God’s dealings with the inhabitants of ancient America (2000  BC – 400 AD).
  • The Doctrine and Covenants, a collection of revelations and inspired declarations given for the establishment and regulation of the Church of Jesus Christ in the last days (1830 AD – 1978 AD).
  • The Pearl of Great Price, a selection of revelations, translations, and writings of Joseph Smith.

This information does not even touch on all the false beliefs of the Mormons.  Check it out for yourself.

http://www.biblebelievers.com/jmelton/Mormons.html

http://bible-truth.org/arelds.htm

http://cnview.com/on_line_resources/are_mormons_christian.htm

So, it is clear that the god the Mormons worship is not the True God of the Bible.  It is also clear that they do not worship the true Christ who says, “I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me” (John 14:6). Nor do they uphold the true Word of God.

So here is the dilemma.  If we have two unbelievers running for president what do we do?  How do we vote?  Let me answer that question with this one.   Are there only two choices?  As a Christian I believe that I should not only vote in each election, but that I should pray and seek out God’s will.  So, would God give His children the choice between two unbelievers?  Would God want us voting for an unbeliever?  Would God not give His children a way to make the right decision?  We might be tempted to cast a vote for an unbeliever because it is the “lesser of two evils.”  We might be tempted to lay aside the candidates faith or our faith and focus on the politics. But as a Christian I cannot separate my faith from my vote.  My faith is not what I do; it is who I am.  My conscience tells me that I would be wrong to vote for an unbeliever, regardless of the circumstances.  You see, God always gives His children the ability to do what is right.  There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it.” (1Co 10:13)

 It was John Quincy Adams that said, “Always vote for principle, though you may vote alone, you may cherish the sweetest reflection that your vote is never lost.”  So it looks like that over the next few months I am going to be doing some research on other 3rd party candidates, trusting that the God of the Bible is sovereign and knowing my conscience is clear.

Biblical Discernment in a World of False Teaching – Part Four

Labels and Doctrines of Men

My husband says that if he could only claim one “label” it would be that of a Biblicist.  He believes that God’s Word is pure, complete, and with the direction of the Holy Spirit able to be understood.   I have really tried to approach God’s Word in this way as well.  With that said, there are a lot of man-made labels.  I’m a Calvinist…I’m Arminian…I’m reformed…I am missional….I am transformational…..I follow MacArthur…I follow Spurgeon…I follow _______ (fill in the blank with the latest church growth guru)…..I am of Paul….I of Apollos….I of Cephas, etc.  Do you get the point?  It is not that I disregard the teaching of men or certain labels. (In fact, the first church continued “stedfastly in the apostles’ doctrine.” )  Labels can be an effective identifier.  We proudly identify ourselves as Baptists.  But a label is only effective as long as it does not diminish or detract from the doctrines found in Scripture.

An example of this would be the Calvinist’s label.  I have met some who will claim this label without fully understanding it.  I have even met “Baptist” who proudly wears the sign, never understanding that Luther and Calvin persecuted those that believed in true Baptist doctrine.  So why would they claim this label? There is too much of God’s Word that contradicts the teaching; yet many still cling to this man-made doctrine as if it is the gospel itself.  For example, the doctrine of limited atonement is one of the “5 TULIPS” and is the belief that the death of our Lord Jesus on Calvary’s cross was strictly limited in any and all of its aspects only to the elect and that it had nothing to do with the non-elect people of the world. This is a doctrinal issue that has been debated for years by many theologians.  I will not attempt to argue the point (too much) but I will say that we must be very careful to not hold up man’s theology in higher regards than God’s precious Word.  The problem I see with those that take this view is that they filter all of the Scriptures through this one particular doctrine.   In other words, what would normally be simple to understand verses are perverted and twisted so that they will fit into Calvin’s doctrine.   To do so is not only unnecessary but also leads to error.  Ask yourself this.  What do you do when you come across a passage in Scripture about God like this one, “Who will have all men to be saved, and to come unto the knowledge of the truth,” 1 Timothy 2:4.   I have always said that the Bible is the best commentary on the Bible we have.

It seems simple to me.  Where God said that we are the elect, I believe it.  Where God said that He wills all men to be saved, I believe it as well.  When God says that “he hath chosen us in him before the foundation of the world,” I believe it.  And where God says Christ was sent to be the “propitiation for our sins: and not for ours only, but also for the sins of the whole world” I believe it too.  To do otherwise would be to hold up some Scripture over the others.  So you could say I believe in the doctrine of election and in the doctrine of free will.  I believe that Christ died for the entire world, but I also believe that not everyone will be saved.  The Scriptures speak of both and no one verse is more important than the other.  So the best way of refuting the false view of limited atonement (or any of the other false doctrines of men) is by simply reading, studying, and knowing God’s Word.

There are several passages that refute limited atonement.  I believe if these verses were taken without the preconceived notions of man and with the direction of the Holy Spirit that a person could only come to one conclusion.  Isaiah 53:5-6, Matthew 11:28, John 1:29, John 3:14-15, Romans 5:6, 2 Corinthians 5:19, 1 Timothy 2:5-6, Hebrews 2:9, 2 Peter 2:1, 1 John 4:14, 1 John 2:2, Titus 2:11

Obviously certain teachings of Calvinism are not the only teaching I am against.  There are many other man-made doctrines that lead us down a slippery slope of false ideas.  The point is that man is fallible.  Man’s teaching can lead to error.  We are weak and make mistakes.  But God’s Inspired Word is perfect.  He makes no mistakes.  It is without error.   And, it is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction and for instruction in righteousness.  It is His Word we should cling to.  Now don’t get me wrong, this is not to say that man’s teaching is futile.  The Bible is clear that we are to teach others.  But this teaching should never be taken lightly.  Those that teach God’s Word will be held to a high standard.  James warns, “My brethren, be not many masters, knowing that we shall receive the greater condemnation.” James 3:1.  My husband is the pastor of a precious group of believers.  He takes his role of teaching very seriously.

“But we will give ourselves continually to prayer, and to the ministry of the word,” Act 6:4.

“Feed the flock of God which is among you,” 1 Peter 5:2a.

“A bishop then must be…apt to teach,” 1Timothy 3:2.

“And he gave some…pastors and teachers; for the perfecting of the saints, for the work of the ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ,” Ephesians 4:11-12.

Likewise, I teach women and write expository Bible studies for women.  But my husband and I would be the first to tell you that you should not take our word for it; study the Scriptures for yourself to see if what we are teaching is true.  May we always be like the believers in Berea that were nobler than the ones in Thessalonica because they “searched the scriptures daily, whether those things were so,” Act 17:11.

The Fallacy and Reality of Submission

“We are leaving the church.”  The comment was made to my husband who is also the pastor of our church.  The reason given for this couple leaving was that his preaching and teaching regarding women was chauvinistic.  When my husband asked them if they would like to see in Scripture where his teaching came from the wife’s reply was, “You can show me, but that will not change my mind.”  After showing her and her husband several passages, their response was that these verses were written thousands of years ago and do not apply to modern society.

Unfortunately, our culture confuses and undermines womanhood and submission with damaging preconceived ideas.  From the moment a young lady is thrust into society she becomes indoctrinated with feministic teachings contrary to Scripture.  Screaming equality, their feminist philosophy holds to the view that “Anything a man can do, I can do better!”  Once more subtle, it has now become blatant. Too often we hear narcissistic phrases such as:  “A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle” and “I like to think of ‘men’ as the diminutive of ‘women’”.  Perhaps the worse one of all is, “God is just an abbreviation for goddess.”   These catch phrases and slogans slowly and surely eat away at the foundation of biblical womanhood and seek to destroy society as a whole.

Consider these quotes.

Any intelligent woman who reads the marriage contract, and then goes into it, deserves all the consequences. – Isadora Duncan

Women are the only oppressed group in our society that lives in intimate association with their oppressors. – Evelyn Cunningham

I ask no favors for my sex…. All I ask of our brethren is that they will take their feet from off our necks.-  Sarah Moore Grimké

As the radical feminist movement spreads throughout our country, the marks of distinction are no longer clear.  Once stood the ungodly, man-hating, ferocious feminist on one side and the Bible believing, meek, and quiet woman on the other.  But regrettably over the last couple of generations, as professing Christians continue to embrace the world; these two groups are slowly evolving together into what we see today.   You see, the thought that teaching on submission is chauvinistic and that Paul’s writings are not relevant did not come from the world and those outside the church.  These thoughts were voiced by professing Christians within the church.

These are just a few of the modern fallacies of submission being spouted.  Another misconception is that if a woman submits to her husband she becomes a doormat to be abused and walked all over.  The worldly belief is that submission lowers a woman’s worth and that it makes a woman subordinate to man.  All of these ideals are false.  However, we cannot ignore this philosophy and the agenda that is being pushed upon Christians today.  Because there is no such thing as amoral education, we must address the fact that the majority of children are being educated on the foundation of humanistic and secular teaching.  Even children that are being educated on Christian principles are exposed to secular beliefs about manhood, womanhood, and marriage via music, television, books, and society.  If not correctly taught, these children will grow into adults who continue to pass along their misconceptions.

How do we expose the fallacies?  It begins and ends with truth.  So let’s take a look at the realities of submission.  The first thing to recognize is that submission is for Christians.  We falsely assume that the non-believer should follow the dictates of Scripture.  While perhaps they should follow scripture, in truth they cannot.  “But the natural man receiveth not the things of the Spirit of God: for they are foolishness unto him: neither can he know them…,”1 Corinthians 2:14.  God designed marriage.  We see where He ordained it and the structure of it in Genesis chapter two.  Adam is created and is given a job to do and a law to keep.  God then looks out and for the first time says that something is not good.  “And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him,” Genesis 2:18.  Eve is made from the rib of Adam and brought to him by God.   Here is the institution of marriage.  Then in Ephesians 5 we are given the directives for the Christian marriage.   “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,” Ephesians 5:22-26. Submission is “as unto the Lord”.  An unbelieving wife cannot properly submit to her husband because she has not submitted her life to the Lord, just as an unbelieving husband cannot properly love his wife because he has not submitted to the Lord.

Now that the foundation has been laid that submission is only possible for the saved, let’s look at it through the eyes of a believer.  Submission is a beautiful term that we should hold dear.  It is through submission to Christ and as Lord of our life that we are saved.  James 4:7 declares “Submit yourselves therefore to God.”  As we saw in Ephesians 5, a wife’s submission to her husband is “unto the Lord”.  In the same way, a child’s submission to the parent’s is in the Lord (Ephesians 6:1-3).  Likewise, believers are told to submit to those in biblical authority (Hebrews 13:17) and those in authority over us such as our government (Romans 13:1, 1 Peter 2:13).  In general, we are to submit to and prefer one another in a spirit of humility (Romans 12:10, 1 Peter 5:5, Ephesians 5:21).  Submission is a part of the believer’s life.

In addition, submission in the biblical marriage portrays to the world a picture of Christ and His bride. “Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing,” Ephesians 5:24.  Just as the church is subject unto Christ, so is the wife to her own husband.  When the Christian wife is not submissive, she is showing the world a distorted depiction of Christ and the church.

 Submission in no way lowers a woman’s worth and makes her subordinate to man.  Christianity, in fact, raises women to a level of honor.  “Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered,”  1Peter 3:7.  The “weaker vessel” implies a more delicate or precious vessel, as in a priceless crystal vase.  She is not common but something rare to be held in high regard.   It is made clear that the husband and wife are “heirs together of the grace of life”.  Man and woman are equal in God’s eyes (Galatians 3:28).  But that does not mean they have the same roles.  Society understands this in every instance until it comes to biblical marriage.  For example, the Governor of your state and his assistant are both created equal as human beings.  However, it would be foolish to assume that because of their equality they should have the same role in government.  As a person, the owner of a corporation and a day laborer are both equal.  But it is easy to see and accept the structure of authority when it comes to the workplace.  Likewise, there is a structure of authority in the home, but the enemy seeks to distort it.

What about the ideal that Paul was a chauvinist?  What about the statement that these verses were written thousands of years ago and not relevant to modern society?  First, as believers we must accept that “all scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness,” 2 Timothy 3:16.  It is an error to pick and choose which verses we want to apply.  If we are going to throw out scripture based on when it was written we would have to disregard the entire Bible.  That would include cherished verses like John 3:16.  So the age of Paul’s writings is an invalid point.  Secondly, Paul’s teaching is not based on cultural customs but on God’s design.  The example Paul gives in I Timothy for women’s role is not a cultural one.  He goes all the way back to creation and the structure of authority in the marriage (I Timothy 2:13-14).  In Ephesians we see the mystery of marriage revealed.  “This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church,” Ephesians 5:32.  Again, it is all by God’s design.

Now that the fallacies have been exposed and the realities declared, where will you stand?  Will you stand on God’s Word and the beauty of His plan for marriage or will you stand on the emotions and opinions of the world?  Here is the amazing reality of absolute truth.  You can accept the truth or reject the truth, but you cannot change the truth.  As a Christian woman, you have an awesome opportunity to illustrate the truths of biblical womanhood and submission.  It is a beautiful thing.  It is God ordained.  And it makes for a great, God-honoring marriage.

State Testing, Standardization, and Godly Standards

With state testing approaching, I’ve had a lot of questions from homeschooling parents about how to prepare and the overall process.  I must say that I am hardly an expert on the subject.  My 15 year old took the Arkansas state test when he was in 3rd grade. After that we moved to a state that did not require state testing.  Now that we have moved back to Arkansas, my children are required to take the standardized tests.  So, we picked up some practice booklets this week.  We got them mostly so the children could practice.  After all, Abigail and Andrew have never “filled in bubbles”.   

When we talk about standardized testing, here is what I want Christian homeschooling parents to know.  If being “standardized” is conformity to a standard, then we need to decide as parents what standard we want our children conformed to.  I wrote an article for Homeschool Enrichment a couple of years ago called Whose Standards Do We Follow.  It is posted below.  I hope that as you are preparing your children for testing this year that it is done with much prayer and with God’s standards in mind.  Blessings!

Whose Standards Do We Follow?

“Mom, who is Oprah Winfrey?” my son asked one day sitting at the kitchen table.  The state we lived in required standardized testing for 3rd through 9th grade.  My son, then 8 years old, was reviewing a practice booklet when he asked the question.  After explaining to him that she was a TV celebrity he asked, “Why do I need to know that?”  With a smile in my heart I replied, “You don’t.”  Later that evening I showed the book to my husband and pointed out several points of concern.  We had come to the conclusion that since the tests were from a secular, humanist, and evolutionary point-of-view, our son would simply be at a disadvantage in taking them.   “Sweetheart, don’t worry about it.”  He said.  “After all, do we really want our children to be standardized?”

It is that very question that we have asked every year since.  As Christian parents do we want our children to be like the rest of the world?  Unfortunately, it is a very easy trap to fall into.  We have a vested interest in our children and want the best for them.  The question is, “What is best?”  Many would agree that if children excel in academics, are well rounded in their social development, are active in sports, can play a musical instrument, are learning a foreign language, score high on the ACT, get a scholarship into a good college, and go on to make a high-paying career for themselves that they are successful.  While the world would unquestionably view this as success, as a believer in Christ, these are not necessarily my standards.  The Apostle John wrote in 1 John 2:15-17 to “Love not the world, neither the things that are in the world. If any man love the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world. And the world passeth away, and the lust thereof: but he that doeth the will of God abideth for ever.”  If we are not careful, our families will indulge in and love the things of this world. This kind of love is to our detriment, for there is a world system that we are not to love or cling to.  The world will pass away therefore the way we live and the standards we set for our children need to be with eternity in mind.  Otherwise, we have sold our children short, “For what is a man advantaged, if he gain the whole world, and lose himself, or be cast away?”(Luke 9:25)

Is it wrong to want our children to excel in academics?  Absolutely not!  But if academic excellence is the goal without the foundation of God and His Word then our priorities are misplaced.  “If ye then be risen with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ sitteth on the right hand of God. Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth.” (Colossians 3:1- 2)  While I want my children to do well in their educational pursuit, I want to measure their success by God’s standards and not the worlds.  Everything that is passed through their minds need to be filtered by the Word of God.  When I taught my 5 year old subtraction my goal was not that he learned the simple mathematic fact of ten minus one equals nine.  My goal was much higher.  Instead, I took him to Luke Chapter 17 and showed him the story of Jesus healing the 10 lepers.  He learned that nine went away and one came back giving thanks to Christ and glory to God.  When we teach with a Biblical mindset, math becomes more than just a lesson.  It becomes an exercise in godliness.

My most important goal as a parent is to teach my children to love the Lord God with all their heart, soul, mind and strength, first and foremost!  Secondly, would be to love their neighbor as their self.   Jesus said that on these two commandments hang all the law and prophets. (Matthew 22:36-40)  I also want to teach them to work hard (Colossians 3:23), not to impress others with their intelligence or for self-centered achievements, but because in working hard we give God glory.  Everything we teach our children can point to God and His glory.  While these goals soar above all others and I fail miserably at times, in truth they are the only ones worth pursuing.  To see how this is practically applied let us look at a few of the core subjects that most children are taught.

Language   –   Whether your child is just learning phonics and how to read or he is diagramming sentences and writing papers, you can easily teach with an eternal perspective.  What is the goal in teaching my child to read?  The most obvious would be that he can read the Bible.  The Creator of the universe and of all that is seen and unseen has given His Word in written form so that we can know Him.  What better motive for teaching my child to read than that?  Why teach my child how to write, speak, and spell properly?  The main reason would be so that he can communicate the glorious gospel to those around him.   Any other achievement would be secondary.  Perhaps, in pursuing the English language your child wins a spelling bee or scores high on a test.  If so, give God the glory.  But do not let those things be your motivation.   The mastering of additional languages can point others to Christ as well.  Perhaps your family is learning Spanish for this reason alone.  Many hearts have been changed and lives given to Christ in foreign lands.  And whatsoever ye do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God and the Father by him. (Colossians 3:17)  “Whatsoever ye do” includes phonics, handwriting, spelling, speech, debate, foreign languages, and language composition.

Math  –  What does a Biblical standard verses a worldly standard look like in teaching mathematics?  We have already looked at teaching a small child using Bible stories.  What other incentives do we have for teaching our children math?  One very practical reason is so that our children will be good financial stewards.  My children might not use higher math such as calculus or trigonometry on a daily basis but they will need basic math skills to be able to balance a check book, pay bills, go to the grocery store, or run a business.  All of these things when well done lend to a good testimony for our Lord.   But it could be that our children have a natural gift for mathematics and are able to go on to use their advanced knowledge for the glory of God.  Sir Isaac Newton, mathematician and physicist, would be a wonderful example of this very thing.

Science  –  Biology, ecology, meteorology, geology, and all the other “ologies” are good things to learn.  It is good to know the periodic table and about the laws of the universe but does my child know the Maker of the universe?  Does my child look at a blade of grass or an animal and see God’s handiwork?  Have I taught my child to stand back and look at all of creation in awe and wonder?   Or am I teaching mere facts in order to pass a test and proceed onto the next course of study?  True science will always point us to God.  Louis Pasteur, Father of Microbiology, said it like this, “The more I study nature, the more I stand amazed at the work of the Creator.  Science brings men nearer to God.”

History  –  It would be impossible to teach all there is to know about history.  There is simply too much information.  If we are not careful this subject can become dull names, tedious dates, and boring facts.  However, if we look at history through the sovereignty of God it becomes His Story.    When we realize that nations rise and fall and that the hearts of kings are stirred by God Almighty our perspective on history changes.  What better opportunity to teach our children Biblical morals and values than to have them read about and study godly characters from the past like George Washington?  In studying history we can also teach the mistakes that mankind has made in the past so that our children and future generations are not doomed to repeat them.   We can learn about important moments in history like when Samuel Morse sent the first telegraph message, “What hath God wrought” taken from the Scriptures.  Or perhaps, in our studies of Italy, as we discover the Leaning Tower of Pisa we can use the opportunity to teach our children spiritual truths about building upon a solid foundation.

Bible  –  While most Christian home school families use a Bible curriculum, it is important to remember that even in studying Scripture we can have a worldly mindset.  Every motive should be examined.  If we only teach parables from the Bible without practical application, if we only teach the law of God without the grace and love of God, and if we only teach Scripture memorization without meditation, we come dangerously close to creating little Pharisees.  It is more important to me that my child loves the Word of God than that my child is able to give a dissertation on the missionary journeys of Paul.  While studying the Apostle’s life is important, if my child truly loves the Word of God he will enthusiastically learn as much as he can about the Bible.  If we develop a love for the Word of God in our children and teach them to diligently seek Him we have given our children a precious gift that can never be taken away.

Learning should be an everyday occurrence and it should not be divided up between secular and spiritual.  As a believer everything should be spiritual.  This happens when we incorporate the things of God into our daily studies and activities.  In doing so it changes not only how we teach but why we teach.  We are no longer just concerned with the outcome but now with the process and the application.  Let’s look at an example of teaching my daughter home economics.  Perhaps by the world’s standard she should learn how to cook, sew and take care of a baby.  But is that enough?  In addition to teaching her the fundamentals, by God’s standards I would teach her from Titus 2:4-5 to “be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.”  By the world’s standards it is good for boys to take a shop or woodworking class.  But the application of that would be that my sons learn “to study to be quiet, and to do your own business, and to work with your own hands, as we commanded you; That ye may walk honestly toward them that are without, and that ye may have lack of nothing.”(1Thessalonians 4:11-12)  I should teach them not only how to work with their hands but also how to be the sole-provider for their families (I Timothy 5:8).

So the question is, “By what standards will we choose to live by?”  As Christian parents we must keep in mind that we will be accountable for the education of our children not based on the world but on God and His Word.  In that knowledge there is great responsibility but also great peace.  Responsibility in that we will answer to God alone for how we teach and train our children.  Peace in that we are not bound by the world’s standards for our children.  Remember that academic excellence is a commendable goal but it must be properly laid with the correct foundation.   “For other foundation can no man lay than that is laid, which is Jesus Christ. Now if any man build upon this foundation gold, silver, precious stones, wood, hay, stubble; Every man’s work shall be made manifest: for the day shall declare it, because it shall be revealed by fire; and the fire shall try every man’s work of what sort it is. If any man’s work abide which he hath built thereupon, he shall receive a reward.” (1Co 3:11-14)  The builder (the Christian parent) needs to seek out the Architect himself (God) and use His own blueprints (the Scriptures).  The sure foundation is Jesus Christ and the gold, silver, and precious stones are those things that are of eternal value.  In the end nothing else will matter.  When the fiery trials of life come and when all our works are manifested, we want to know that what we have built into our children will last.  It is those things that we must pursue and by those standards that we must live by.

 Whose Standards Do We Follow by Kimberly Williams, Originally published in Homeschool Enrichment Magazine, Issue #44 March/April 2010